We are told that we should let our children play in the dirt, let them get muddy as it helps them to build up a healthy resistance to bugs……if we wrap
them up in cotton wool their immune systems don’t get a chance to strengthen. What do we call this???? Resilience…….If you have kinder or primary aged children you have probably heard the word “resilience” mentioned lately.
They are now teaching children to learn to cope with setbacks or
challenges and ways to learn and move on from trying times. We would all love to teach our children that the world is perfect, that all people are lovely, that they shall never have to deal with upsets, that we are all equal; that there is no competition in life…….but that is not real life, is it? We all have set backs, challenges and sorrows and we all need to have skills to give us
resilience to get back up and dust ourselves off. We need to learn that when we get knocked down to get back up, that what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger, that failures teach us new ways of looking at things,and one of my all time favourites: that when one door closes another opens. What are some ways we can be resilient, what do we do to make ourselves cope when times are tough? What are some coping tools that we can use? We can think back to a time where we have made it through a similar situation for example….if we start a new job and feel inadequate or feel like we are not ever going to get it….Think back to another time where you have successfully learnt a new task and know within yourself that you will settle in and that change takes time. We can reward ourselves when we make it through a challenge, how many of us have promised an unwilling child a lollipop after a doctors or dentist visit? I have. We can seek help and advice from those we trust. We can use self talk to tell ourselves that we can get through anything……talk to yourself like a comforting friend would. Believing that “when one door closes another opens” can help. Visualise the situation being resolved or forgiven. Having some type of faith, that we are all here for a reason, to learn and to love helps. Using the Catastrophe scale, (see my post titled Catastrophe scale under the Stress Heading), puts things into perspective and is very helpful. If you are a parent think of your child coming to you with your challenge…what would you say to them and what advice would you give them to help them cope? Give yourself this same advice. What tools do you use to help you manage? Please share as the more tips we get the more resilient we can be……….
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