Sometimes you need to let go……

I am a dog with a bone.....Don't even think of trying to make me let go!!!!!

I am a dog with a bone.....Don't even think of trying to make me let go!!!!!

Can you be a bit of a dog with a bone sometimes????  Do you find it hard to let go of an issue or problem???  Do you find yourselves thinking about a past issue and going over and over it in your mind a bit too much???  I know I can definitely be guilty of this one. I read something once that made me realize that I should really try to “Let Go” of  past stuff and move on.  I thought I might share this story with you and hope it helps…..(I will improvise the story as I don’t remember it word for word):

There were 2 buddhist monks walking on a long journey to the nearest town.  They had been walking for days when they got to a river crossing.  At this time of year the crossing was normally very easy to cross as the water only trickled through.  The day that they had arrived at the river, it was flowing fast and waist-high.  They knew that they had to cross as they had to get to the other side.  Just as they were about to cross a lady with a baby approached them and asked for help.  She too, had to get to the other side but was very scared that she might drop her sick baby or fall in the river.  She was desperate to get to the other side to get her sick baby to the Doctor.  The Buddhist monks were not allowed to touch a women and one of the monks insisted that they could not help as it was against their religion, the older of the monks could see the fear in the mother’s eyes and agreed to help.  Together they carried her and her baby over the river and she was most grateful.  A day later the younger monk spoke up worryingly, “We should not have touched that woman, it is against our religion”   The older monk simply replied  “Are you still carrying that woman, I put her down at the other side of the river, and that is where we leave it”  I loved this message.  Some things we just have to let go of, especially things in the past that can not be changed.  Going over and over them in our mind will never resolve the issue, it just makes us stress and open up old wounds. I think that this quote says it all…….. “You can clutch the past so tightly to your chest that it leaves your arms too full to embrace the present.” Jan Glidewell

What things do you do to “let go of the bone”?  Can you pass on some tips to share??

4 responses to “Sometimes you need to let go……

  1. Letting go was one area in my life that I spent far to much time and energy on. Nowadays I will unfortunately still stress over an issue, but family and life is moving far too quickly that I simply don’t have the time nor the energy to gnaw on the problem. There are many small problems that arise all the time that could leave you totally exhausted if you keep hold of them.

    One of my work colleagues is what I classify as “High Maintenance”. Recently I apparently didn’t great her appropriately and as a result she began talking to other staff about me. In the past (to my shame) I would probably have engaged in this “bitching” and I would have worried about it constantly at work and at home until I was totally stressed out, and the problem would be bigger. This time around (yes it’s happenend before) I just thought “I don’t have the time or energy for this” so I just told the staff that were running to me with stories exactly that and to not tell me anything else because I really don’t want to know. Hey presto, problem solved, I didn’t expend any energy on it, everyone left it alone, and we all enjoyed a pleasant Christmas lunch. There are some issues that are just not worth engaging in as you can take them on board and they weigh you down, and you spend far to much negative energy on them…..

  2. Your’e right Melissa, holding onto and going over stuff is exhausting. In this busy world the last thing we need is to start gathering and carrying around extra problems. I remember one day, my daughter and I were alone a special girls shopping day out, we were walking along and she was busy telling me about what had happened at school that week….what was I doing??? Stressing out and going over and over in my mind about a work problem, when she said to me “Mum, are you listening?” I felt sooooo bad. I was not listening to her. At that precise moment I made the choice that work issues were sorted at work and family time was family time. If a work problem ever creeps into my mind whilst outside of work, I tell myself….”No, not now, tomorrow is another day” It is great that nipped your “High Maintenance Colleague”… the bud. Life is too short and precious to get weighed down……Thanks Melissa lovely to hear from you!

  3. I have learnt over the years to move on quite quickly!! Especially at work. At work you have to learn to not take things personally and move on as the other person usually moves on once they have hung up the phone or left your office. I hate having negative energy as it tires you out, makes you negative, less productive and toxic to be around! I have also found this in relationships too. When you have an argument with family or a loved one, you usually say something you shouldn’t and that you don’t really mean and you know in time that you will get back to the way you were, so why waste hours, days, months or even years not talking to each other as this is time you will NEVER get back. Life is too short 🙂

  4. Life is short Lizzie, and if you ask yourself if the argument or issue is really worth the stress and negativity, if it is really worth ruining relationships over I am sure that 9 times out of 10 it is not. If you found out that the person you had the issues with was in an accident, hurt or was sick…would you still hold so tightly onto the issue or would you want to resolve differences and move on.

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